Is telling kids to "use your words" always the best approach? Research shows that multimodal storytelling—using visuals, play, and gestures—helps children communicate more effectively. Learn why non-verbal communication is essential for childhood development and how to support your child’s emotional expression beyond words.

Why We Default to 'Use Your Words'

If you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver, you’ve probably said it—“Use your words.” It’s a natural instinct. We want kids to express themselves, solve problems, and develop strong language skills.

But here’s the thing: language isn’t always the best—or even the most effective—way for kids to communicate, especially when emotions are overwhelming.

Young children’s brains are still developing the neural pathways for verbal communication, meaning they rely just as much—if not more—on gestures, visuals, play, and storytelling to process their emotions and thoughts. So, when we insist on words alone, we might actually be making it harder for them to communicate.

Why 'Use Your Words' Can Be Limiting - according to science

For kids under seven years old, verbal communication is still a work in progress. Their cognitive and linguistic skills are developing, but their brains are already wired for non-verbal expression through movement, play, and imagery.

Here’s why pushing words too soon can be counterproductive:

🧠 Linguistic vs. Non-Linguistic Neural Pathways

The brain processes verbal and non-verbal communication in different ways. The left hemisphere, which controls speech, takes time to develop. Meanwhile, the right hemisphere—responsible for imagery, emotion, and sensory processing—is far more active in young children. This explains why kids often show how they feel before they can put it into words.

📚 Cognitive Development Stages

According to Jean Piaget’s cognitive development theory, children in the preoperational stage (ages 2–7) communicate best through symbolic play, images, and gestures. When forced to verbalize emotions they can’t yet articulate, frustration—not understanding—often follows.

💭 Emotional Processing & Memory Storage

Emotions are stored in the limbic system, particularly the amygdala and hippocampus, which are more connected to sensory and visual memories than verbal recall. This is why children often express feelings through drawing, role-play, or storytelling before they can explain them in words.

🌎 Language Variability & Inclusivity

Not all children develop language at the same pace. Neurodivergent children, bilingual learners, and those with speech delays may struggle with verbal communication but excel in alternative forms of expression. Multimodal learning helps ensure all children have the tools they need to communicate effectively.

The Power of Multimodal Storytelling

Instead of relying solely on words, multimodal storytelling—which integrates visuals, movement, and creative play—gives kids more ways to communicate.

How Multimodal Learning Benefits Children:

✅ Activates Both Hemispheres of the Brain – Combining words, visuals, and gestures strengthens the neural connections between logic and creativity.
✅ Boosts Emotional Regulation – Drawing, role-playing, or acting out a story gives kids a safe, stress-free way to process emotions.
✅ Supports Literacy Development – Structuring stories visually before verbalizing helps build narrative and comprehension skills.
✅ Increases Confidence – Kids who have multiple ways to communicate feel empowered rather than frustrated.

How StoryMii Helps Kids Communicate Beyond Words

At StoryMii, we believe kids should have the freedom to express themselves in a way that feels natural to them. Our interactive storytelling platform allows children to create their own narratives through:

🎨 Customizable characters & settings
📖 Story-driven play that mirrors natural communication
💡 Research-backed multimodal learning strategies

By supporting both verbal and non-verbal pathways, StoryMii helps children develop stronger language skills, emotional intelligence, and creative thinking—without the pressure to “use their words” before they’re ready.

What to Say Instead of 'Use Your Words'

So, the big question at this point might be: well what AM I supposed to do to understand their tantrums. Instead of prompting a child to talk when they might not be ready, try:

💬 “Can you show me how you’re feeling?” (Encourages gestures, facial expressions, or drawings)
🎭 “Let’s create a story about what’s happening.” (Allows kids to process emotions through play)
🎨 “Can you pick a picture or color that matches how you feel?” (Supports emotional identification through visuals)
📚 “What do you think your character would do?” (Encourages children to express feelings through storytelling)